What the FUCK was I thinking!

That pretty much sums it up.......

I would like to claim that the real answer is: I wasn't (thinking that is). But honestly I do believe that I have thought a lot about all of it. Not during, but after. Ignorance would be bliss here, but it would be a lie and a cop out.

And now I continue to think, probably over think, every decision, interaction, word spoken. Wasted emotional energy, I know. But it feels like if I don't learn something here... this will come again and the lesson will be harder, and probably even more devastating.

So... Smart enough to know better, too stupid to care?
No actually... Smart enough to know that I'm just not that smart (especially when it comes to things like this).

(You can thank Jenny Owen Youngs for her song Fuck Was I that got me here today)

"Skillet on the stove... such a temptation.
Maybe I'll be the lucky one that doesn't get burned.
What the fuck was I thinking?"